Meet Shoenice – the (quite likely) mentally challenged man who will eat absolutely anything someone requests. Handle of vodka? You betcha. Lit candles? Not a problem. Full tube of caulk? Just another monday night.
All we ask is that one day he gets around to our requests: a bottle of lighter fluid, can of neon green paint, and 1 pound of chalk. Oh by the way, Happy 4th of July, eat fireworks, get wasted.